10.10.2008

Janet Jack'Me?

I got a very interesting email from a former paramour yesterday. Seems he had been introduced to a porn star that reminded him of me...

Now some women might be offended by this, but with and alias like "Cherry Virtuocity", clearly I'm not of that ilk. I did however want to know who this bitch was.

I was at work and I was certain a google image search for Kandee Lixx would produce all sorts of "not safe for work" content so I looked her up on my phone and surprisingly the first image that came up was a headshot.

::pause::

Looking at Ms Lixx, I really saw no resemblance between us. She has a fairer complextion, she was thinner, and rocking a long hawaiian silky (weave for those who don't know). About the only thing I could see that we had in common were big boobs (tittaaaaaays!!! ::doing a chest giggle::)

I finally decided to call my former boo (he hates that particular term of endearment..lol) and asked what in the WORLD about this chick reminded him of me. Clearly I was missing something. Did we have similar labia? I mean I just was kinda stumped.

As I waiting for him to pick up, in my head I could here him going on about how in some particular flick he'd seen, Ms Lixx attempted to duplicated one of my signature suckles or some other feat of sexual acrobatics...

I was wrong.

He asked me if I had really taken a good look at her. I tried to download one of her flicks on my computer at home, but I couldn't find any featuring Ms Lixx on Limewire. He directed me to some random site and I was able to see the lady work. So I'm watching this clip of her doing her thing and he began commentating, talking about her ass, the curve of her waist, her hips... Slowly I realized that in his head ::pause:: this is what I looked like.

At first I was certain that this was all just a pussy ploy, and yeah I'm sure it was in part, but also, he really sees my body like this. I'm looking at this woman who in my opinion has a much better body than I do (though I think her makeup was over done, my hair is real and styled better and, in fact, my labia trump hers!) and here he is drooling over what he considers to be an okay substitute for the real thing (yes that would be me... I'm am in fact just like a bottle of Coke, curvy, classic and always a crowd pleaser).

It was an unexpected ego boost that came in a most unordinary form. I guess I shouldn't be so critical of myself. I am in fact, just as sexy as I think I am.