Press Play...

::Cue Ms. Jackson::

Tired of being number 2
I can do what she can't do
So much betta I'm for you
So so much betta I'm for you

Why, oh WHY?!? Do men choose to date subpar women?! I'm tired of being passed over. Most of the men I've kicked it with in the the last few years have decidedly not wanted to persue anything serious with me and then within months end up dating some random ass chick. What is that about? And to add insult to injury the turn into long term entanglements, and I'm looking at the girl, and then at myself and find myself saying "are you fucking kidding me?!"

Prime example. This kid I used to be into was dating this one girl off an on for years. He has aspirations of being a lawyer or even President someday but he stayed dating this balled-up brawd and I keep thinking "how does she really fit into your future?" You can't take a chick w/ a gel weave to the office holiday party and introduce her to the firm partners as your "better half".

Forget your basic upgrade... let me revitalize your circumstances. Is your life stagnat, well instead of letting that mosquito of a girlfriend suck all the life force out of you ::pause:: let me help you help yourself. The season isn't over, let's review the tape, pull out the play book and plan our strategy. I'm allergic to mediocrity, if I catch you slippin I will help you step it up. At the same time if you're on point I will be sure to have my shit together. I always play my position. Need me to be eye candy for evening... got you. Need me to be a boss and bad bitch my way into that item the store said was unavailable... no problem.

::cue Kimmy::
Does she do it like me?
Does she work that body?
Throw that ass like pu-pump-pump-pu-pump that hottie...

Why are you calling me, texting me, emailing me, smoke signalling trying to get in my panties if you are so happy with your girlfriend, wife, boorilla, whateva? Dating someone who can't float your boat is stupid. My platinum walls are plush, my lips are lucious and my liquids are libatious. I'm the big body benz, I'm an investment, 20 years from now you'll still be jocking my sleek lines, cushy interior and dazzling headlight. However you cheaped out and bought a Hyundai... no matter how you look at it it's still a Hyundai.

::cue Fionna::
I'll let you see me, I'll covet your regard
I'll invade your demeanor
And you'll yield to me like a scent in the breeze
And you'll wonder what it is about me

Please don't confuse me with dog, I'm different... My thoughts exactly Jay. I may not be your typical type. I many not have been what you were looking for at all but admit... you still like me. Just go with! I'm not typical in any way or fashion and men seem to run away from what isn't the norm. Why is that? I don't have a problem with letting you me, flaws and all. I'll play into whatever game you like to play. I love being submissive and I'll give you all of my attention... but don't get upset when I know you like the back of my hand and can see through all your game and bullshit. That's the way it works. The mirror goes both ways. The more I let you see of me, the more of you I get to know.

Most bitches can't hold a candle to me. Fact. I have a certain je ne sais quoi and you won't ever forget me.

::cue Badu::
If you want too feel me baby
Better be divine
Bring me water for these flowers
Growing out my mind

Give me nothin' just be gentle
Breathe love in my air
Use me, don't abuse me, love me
Cause these herbs are rare

I found myself sitting on my couch this weekend, and took stock of my life. I'm 27, college educated (at one of the top 3 schools in my field no less), gainfully employed and have no kids. I'm well rounded, not hoodie but street savvy. I can throw down in the kitchen, in the bedroom, and in the boardroom. I take care of myself, I try to keep it taunt (we're working on tight), I take my vitamins, keep my hair, nails and toes, correct. I'm sweet, thoughtful and caring. I like sports, I like the arts. Though not a home owner, I will most likely inherit the building I currently occupy... so... where's the down side? Why am I still single?

I dunno why but I do know I'm not settling for bullshit. I don't kick it to just anyone. It takes someone special to catch my interest which is why I think I find it so disappointing when I find someone I think is a contender, who will really challenge me as a partner, decides to take a lower card when they could be in the title fight. I want someone who will nurture me as I nurture them. I'm special so I want someone just as special...

In closing I will quote myself from an away message I crafted in undergrad:

What other woman do you know can hold her own in any conversation from discussions on the latest hip-hop battle to Lysistrata and classical greek literature.  Can recite the first 16 bars of Nigga What Nigga Who, or the first 16 lines to Chaucer's Canterbury tales in Old English.  Loves Bvlgari jewelry, but can't live w/o amber & silver rings.  Loves indie and foreign flicks, but would be content watching Xmen on the WB saturday morning.  Who is comfortable enough to go out and buy porn and dare someone to say something, but is still wholesome enough to introduce to your moms.  Who else can cook a gourmet meal and find you the best Chardonnay you've ever had for less than $20.  A chick who doesn't talk shit, just does her thing.  In Biggie's words "heard she can suck a good dick and cook a steak up"